Weary to the Bone
by rainingWolf
Summary: They were dancing. It was one of those moments when he was lucid, knew his purpose, wondered at the feeling of the Princess's brown hands against his own, and thought what had he ever done to deserve this woman before him. / for #kuroweek2k17. Day 7- Scars/Injury.


For #kuroweek2k17. Day 7- Scars/Injury.

Cover Image by **tropicoola** on Tumblr.

\- Warning for suicide attempt.

* * *

They were dancing. It was one of those moments when he was lucid, knew his purpose, wondered at the feeling of the Princess's brown hands against his own, and thought what had he ever done to deserve this woman before him.

No one was in the room with them and some Altean song that was reminiscent of music long ago echoed through the chamber.

Shiro turned, guiding Allura steadily through a series of movements and she twirled once, twice, her skirt swirling outwards like a half moon embracing the sky-

They both stopped when the sole of her heels sunk deep into the tip of his boots.

"Oh! I'm so sorry! Does it hurt? I-"

His lips quirked upwards, the first genuine smile on his face since the day the Black Lion showed signs of life, and his hand came up to stop the warm palm reaching for his shoulder.

"It's all right. Worse has happened to me. This is nothing."

Allura paused as her furrow creased, marring and twisting as her mouth drawn down as well. Her head tilted to the side. "You've had worse?" Her voice trailed off and he sworn at that moment that he could see the wisp of words forming together to suffocate him.

Shiro shrugged and took a step back casually, pulling a mildly amused smile to his lips. He was aiming for disarming, to deflect, but by the look of Allura's lips flattening to a mournful expression, he could tell it didn't work.

"You don't have to worry about that." He shifted in the silence as he followed those familiar purple eyes' path towards the fleeting jagged lines across his left wrists that shone pearly white for a second underneath the chamber's lights before he let his sleeves overtook his wrists to shield them away from Allura's piercing gaze.

Whether to protect himself from Allura or to shield the marks from her eyes, he didn't know. But his action was swift and secure as he let go of their intertwined hands and started his retreat.

"Tell me about them." A request. Not a command.

Shiro's slow but steady retreat halted instantly and he couldn't help but exhale slowly, deeply, as if him breathing was the only thing anchoring him to the floor. He held up his left hand. It was trembling. His eyes mirrored the same path as Allura's; they both worked its way along the longest pale scar.

It was also the deepest.

"Please," Allura breathed into the silence of the chamber as she looked forlornly at him; her dress was still for the first time since music played in the room.

The change in Shiro was minute but it was unmistakable and it was all in his eyes because nothing about his posture shifted. Nothing altered to indicate duress. Not at first, at least, until he said in a tight voice, "You don't need to know, Princess."

He took another step back as though shifting to a more comfortable position; he was one step closer to the exit. And he would have missed the whisper if he was a lesser man. But he wasn't so he heard the trickling of words in his ears as Allura murmured, "But I _want_ to know."

A rueful smile worked its way on his face as he replied, "No, you really don't." But he couldn't escape that soulful look that threatened to cloud his mind with memories he could never tell her. That gaze cut into him like the knife he had pressed against his skin that many nights ago when there was nothing but blackness seeping in his spirit.

The Black Paladin echoed in response, "Please." He dropped his hand, ignoring the tremors riding down his arm, and took another deep breathe.

"Don't ask. Because if you ask again, I'll tell you everything. And I can't afford to do that. I _can't_ -" He cut off and looked away, something like regret crossing his face before he could shutter it away.

"Please," the Black Paladin said as Allura crossed the open space and reached for him.

"Please," he said as she placed her hand on his cheek, warming him up at the single touch.

"Please."

* * *

\- While the scenario isn't dark, the fact that Shiro tried to kill himself is a rather dark subject indeed.

\- Reviews are much appreciated.

\- Enjoy! :)


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